Just catching up

I usually go out 1-3 times a week, I wind up talking with many people because I am very unique in my area of Atlantic County. I'm sure they're are a few other Cd's who may venture out but prefer to keep very low profiles and I wouldn't recommend anything else for them unless their lives were very secure in all aspects.



I find it very interesting that in my particular situation and one of the reasons I dress as Louise is due to the way people interact with me, where as Lou, it's an non interaction and the difference is demonstrative. To get to the topic, many people, usually women with confide in me some very personal information about relatives who may be gay or who at CD's or TG. This Friday night 10/12/07 a woman told me about lack of sex life with her husband, she was 62 so I assume her husband was no less that age and probably slightly older. I said women need to go on estrogen at her age and men have testosterone reduction at that age also and maybe he needs to be treated. The other suggestion I made was, if she feels sexual and he is non compliant that her age she has all the right to make her self happy anyway she feels fit. She hugged me and thanked me as if I was giving her affirmation and my blessing. What is interesting is that seems to be a common event when I'm Louise, but never as Lou.



I have to also say that this exact transformation has occurred with me son, we had a very augmentable relationship but since he met Louise he treats me much differently and we have a much more pleasant time together.



My question is, do I change or is it the way people see me that changes.

Vette Show in Ocean City, NJ

I rarely go out on Sundays as Louise, but my wife had gone on a cruse last week 09/19/07 so I was bored and figured I'd do some cruising too.

The first thing I like to do weekends is to race bike (usually 45 miles) with a group, I don't do well but I hang in. Then I came home and dressed up and decided to wear my camouflage mini dress (I wanted to blend) LOL.

The next thing I did was to go to the local restaurant my wife and I patronize every Sunday, the Waite staff love me, as Louise, and I can always see people staring or asking about me, I want to be noticed and feel if I'm not then I dressed to conservatively.

After my meal I headed to OC and found a parking spot fairly close to the boardwalk where I just pranced up to the boardwalk. I had my DSLR camera because I wanted to do some nice pictures, I walked a few blocks and noticed a young man, about 30, walk across the boardwalk in my direction who gave me a glance but I always expect that so didn't pay any attention to him. About a block or two later I hear a person say "do you mind if I talk with you" I turned and it was this young man, I said of course not and he replied "I love you and so does Jesus" well he didn't know me very well. By the time we got through walking about 20 blocks together he had told me a lot about himself and why he became "born again". He was a very nice person and if people don't know, Ocean City is a very Christian community, mostly Christian Science or other extreme groups who say they accept everyone unless they don't fit they're nitch.

I know as I walked by some of the groups of people who were sitting by the railing due to the long boring event I was receiving a lot of attention, I would hear some of the women laugh, I'm sure that 15-25 years ago they were a lot more attractive and slimmer, but possibly they were reacting to the way I looked in my mini and were reflecting on how they would have looked in it today and thought they would look comical.

I finally saw someone with another DSLR and figured I would ask if he would be kind enough to use my camera to take a couple of pictures of me. I must have really startled him because he almost stuttered and then took to shots without even considering the composition but at least I had something to prove my story. The picture does little to compliment me, my hair was wind blown and I was up there for about 2 1/2 hours and facing a very bright sun, I look much better in very dim lighting, if you get the drift.

Louise

An Interesting few weeks as Louise

I don’t find that I post enough to my blog because I tend to get involved with other things and possibly the main reason I do so many things as Louise it just seems normal for me and I don’t want to come off sounding like a braggart.

The last few weeks have been very busy for me, first my wife was some what car jacked, not to go into details it was quite an experience, fortuity she wasn’t hurt but we’re still sorting out details. Next she recently left Studio Six in Atlantic City after 10 years as the Karaoke hostess up to 4 nights a week; it was getting too dangerous in the area besides other conditions. But she got a new gig once a week closer to our home and I help her set up and tear down as Louise.

A few weeks ago I was the photographer at a Civil Union, one person's parents were there and the other one’s ex-wife and children attended. It was a very short but beautiful service and the first I had attended of a same sex marriage.

I also had an appointment and I decided to go as Louise, it’s always interesting to see how people treat me as Louise when doing business, they’re either afraid I’m off balance and agree to my demands or my affect in femme mode over powers them, I don’t know but I do know I get what I want as Louise. From there I went to a friend’s beauty salon just to say hello, a young nail technician offered to do my nails for nothing but I still took care of her. As I turned while waiting for my nails to dry the lady behind me said hi and asked if I was an actress, I asked why would you ask that, she said well you’re a beautiful woman and keep yourself in great condition and your makeup is wonderful, you just don’t see people like you. I said no, I’m a cross dresser, she almost fell out of her chair, she was shocked. Turns out she was a Nurse Practitioner at the local rescue mission, I know the past and current directors because I raced bicycle with the past one and went to school with the assistant director’s brother. We had a long and very understanding conversation about alter egos because she says when she has her lab coat on she feels less veritable due to losing her left lower leg in an auto accident and the lab jacket covers it.

This past Sunday 07/20/07 my wife was contracted to be a hostess at a multi party (birthday, anniversary, graduation) there were about 200 people 20-30 were fireman with the lady’s husband, I have to say they were a very tough group to break, they’re all mucho types and are afraid to show any variability’s by accepting a cross dresser and were waiting for one brave hero to at least accept me so the rest of them could, it turned out reasonably well, I think at least 70% accepted me the rest I better be me or they might leave me to burn. Another pat of this is I was asked to come as Lou and set up and have people meet me as Lou, then I was to transform into Louise, the lady’s daughter is a makeup artist and did my face, I thought pretty good. An interesting thing was the 14 year old male cousin who was somewhat androgynous in looks and build; he had to stay to watch the transformation and loved it with a mixed manner. What I mean is he’s 14 and trying to be the boy he was born so he’s trying to be mucho like all the friends that were there but also has mixed inner feelings as to his sexual direction. I know this can open a lot of discussion so I’m mentioning it.

Anyway that’s the short version, if anyone would like more details so they might have an idea how to handle themselves in a situation they’re not comfortable with just ask, I always want to help.

Louise

A busy week

Interesting happinings

It's been a while since I posted last, a lot of interesting things have happened in my life.

I became a grand dad/ Mom to a beautiful girl, Maya Faye, and she has met Louise many times with her mom and dad.

I have also met a few new Cd's who we've helped with makeup and I took one out to a casino. For the most part compatibility is very, very limited or disappointing.

My wife, Millie, finally left her Karaoke hostess job at the only gay club in Atlantic City after 11 years, it was just too dangerous up there anymore and leaving work at 3 AM in the morning made her a moving target for anyone looking for pray.

Well they're is tons more I could post but I don't know if anyone reads my Blog.

Louise

Makeover Service

Millie & Louise's makeovers

My Wife Millie and I have been able to help many other Cd's with makeup, dressing, shopping and also going out for their first encounter in public. We don't offer a flashy website and I will not post our client's pictures or give out their SN's to confirm us, but I will send a couple testimonials about how they appreciated our inexpensive, friendly and honest help.

Please feel free to contact me at CuteLouise1@aol.com or CuteLouise@yahoo.com

If I feel we can be of service and help you with your needs I will give you my cell number so we can confirm who we are and send directions.

Louise

Makeover Service

Millie & Louise's makeovers

My Wife Millie and I have been able to help many other Cd's with makeup, dressing, shopping and also going out for their first encounter in public. We don't offer a flashy website and I will not post our client's pictures or give out their SN's to confirm us, but I will send a couple testimonials about how they appreciated our inexpensive, friendly and honest help.

Please feel free to contact me at CuteLouise1@aol.com or CuteLouise@yahoo.com

If I feel we can be of service and help you with your needs I will give you my cell number so we can confirm who we are and send directions.

Louise

A new friend

I met a new friend about 8 months ago. I am very attracted towards her and she has brought me new life. We share many of the same interests and even though she is younger than me she has patiance and has been showing me new ways for mutual satisfaction.
My wish is that I can fullfil her needs so that we can remain excluive with eachother.

Life of Louise

Life of Louise

At my Business

Oops 

Blue Spandex 

Me as Louise 

My life after starting cross dressing

I started cross dressing at a very early age, about 7/8 years old, but not in the traditional sense with makeup, only with things found in my mothers dresser. I suppose most Cd's start with this type of attraction that may lead to a fetish and then beyond to actually trying to look as femme as possible in this particular case.

I want to define some of my thoughts about this particular "fetish" or activity. We all for the most part use the reductionism theory that anyone with this compulsion must be gay or just into it for sexual gratification or they want to be a woman. For both extremes this may be true but then again anything carried to an extreme i.e.: religious beliefs, hobbies, work, exercise and so on can be considered fetishes also if practiced to an extreme.

Now back to my life as a CD/TV. I had always had a fascination in seeing women in foundation garments and stockings, any clothing tight and form fitting. At my age pantyhose had not yet been invented nor spandex or Lycra but there was Dacron and nylon.

When ever I was alone which was quite often, my mother worked 2-3 shifts and was a very angry and hostile person especially towards me I would raid her dresser.

Of course as with most Cd's we all develop guilt feelings and purge our collections. Probably to try to conform to what we consider traditional and normally accepting life styles. Also I think at least before the personal computer we all thought we were the only ones with this perversion or interest which of course added to our guilt.

Well, that went on for years until I got my first PC in 1999 and then the crap hit the fan so to speak. I found there were many others out there with the same interests. Either through fantasy which was the majority or some who actually felt and acted as I did. I had to share this new information with my wife. I cried as she saw the posts and talked to one person I met on line. We actually met them for dinner because they lived about 40 miles from us and we were both mature and felt it would help relive the guilt we felt by confessing our desires with both our wife's with us. I really think it helped my wife become very comfortable with the whole thing.

Then the unexpected happened. I got a call from my wife one day, it was Halloween and she told me she had a surprise for me. I was to go home, clean up, shave close and to bring one of my dresses and wig to her store, she had a friend who had a friend who was a makeup artist who was going to make me up for Halloween.

Well, I know what I look like as me and I've seen myself with a wig on and only lipstick "it ain't a pretty picture" and I was pretty reluctant to do it but still very excited to see what I might look like with a "Pro" making me up. I guess we all have high expectations.

Well, I came into her store and there was a young man gay obviously smoking with a large make up kit. He said sit down and DON'T look in the mirror till I'm done. I think he only worked on me about 45 minutes, but it took 2 hours because he was a chain smoker and would puff away in between each application he did on me. He was very determined and used techniques I would have never considered. My wife watched as the transformation progressed. Finally he put the wig on, it was one of the cheap Cher type long black wigs and combed it out. Then he said OK stand up and take a look. I don't know how to express this so that you can understand. I will try to express it as best I can. I looked and all I saw was the most beautiful person staring back at me, I never had such an emotional feeling, it was as if I was reborn, it was as if there was a splinter in my brain that I could never touch but knew it was there and someone now removed it. I just stood there and started to sob. I never cried so hard in my life, I was finally happy.

May I ask you, was that feeling sexual in nature or was it finally being satisfied with who or what you looked like. Was that a perversion or fetish or finally finding yourself. All I can say is I'm a very out and about person as Louise. I have never in the 7 years I've been CDing encountered a negative situation where in 5 minutes the other person has their arm around me and wants to be my friend.

You can belief as you want, but I have found that we all are controlled by peer pressure and collective thinking. I was also. But as Louise I go against tradition and I am a much happier person for it. It has helped bring my family closer together because now I don't have to prove that I am as tough or big as the next person. I always had a Napoleonic personality at being only 5'3 tall I had to prove my self. My son and wife had big issues with me. Now as Louise my son and his soon to be wife go out with me.

So again I ask, what is wrong with being happy?

Please if you read this suggest any comments or ask any questions you want. My focus is trying to help others understand tolerance and being your own person and living your life for you while being a credit to your family and community.

I am "Louise" and proud

I was given the honor of being asked to be the first cover girl of 2006 on "Lady Like Magazine" I want to thank publishers Jo Ann Roberts (TV) and her S/O Lady Astra (GG) and Editor Angela Gardner (TV) who met me in person and felt I deserved the attention of their fine High Quality National publication.