A touchy Situation

Over the past year I have finally met a few gurls I felt comfortable with in allowing them to accompany me to a couple of the lounges I patronize.

By doing this I risk a possibility of management asking me to either NOT bring others with me or at worse banning me from their premises. I also have a FIRM rule, please DO NOT use the "lady's room", even though the law seems to say a person with Gender ID issues (might) be allowed, I don't think the management is comfortable with a person with male genitilia and NO "F" on any identification using their Ladies room.

In my case I feel honored that management by allowing me to dress as I please as long as it's tasteful and I don't cause trouble by being or acting inappropriate. To me this signals to the other patrons I fit in. To me that is like proving I'm respected for who I am and that it is assumed by management I will conduct myself in a proper way and respectively I don't push my limits.

I did NOT want to post about this subject for fear of not conveying it properly and maybe upsetting people I consider friends who are TG (Transgendered) similar to now the famous Bruce Jenner aka "Caitlyn", but last night one of my guests who seems to be able to convey important subjects better than I sent me their take on a possibly explosive situation that occurred with their visit.

"Her thoughts"

I wrote and posted this to my blog tonight and thought you'd appreciate my thoughts. Hope you are well.

Summer oh sweet summer.  How I wish I could wear a sleeveless shift dress and sandals to work.  It’s too hot to be traipsing around in male business mode.  Summer is made for women and the female wardrobe.  Bare legs feeling the caress of gentle warm breezes, painted toes peeking playfully from the front of my wedge sandals.

Out with friends and en femme all weekend was fulfilling, gratifying and rewarding.  Making new friends and solidifying existing friendships always lifts my spirits.  Thank you my sister friends for supporting me.  I love you more than words can convey.

For two weeks consecutively I was presented with a dilemma that my cranial capacity struggled to absorb.  The sponge of gray matter may need a tune up.  Please read this carefully and heed these thoughts that come not from me but through me from others who are closer to matters of importance than your scribe.

Presentation makes or breaks people, places and things.  How we present not only impacts us, it impacts the group we represent and reflects directly on venues we frequent, their proprietors, their patrons and ultimately on our acceptance.

Yes I know all about First Amendment rights, freedom of expression and all those platitudes the founders chose to craft into the Constitution of The United States.  Factions believe they have the absolute right to express in any way they feel, regardless of the appropriateness of such form of expression.

 

Can we be oblivious to the sensitivities of others in our pursuit of free speech?  We’ve discussed battles and wars in the context of being technically right but realistically wrong.  You can’t think putting people at risk by making a spectacle of yourself is cool or welcome.

Family venues are expected to be wholesome and safe for children of all ages.  Would you bring your child(ren) to locales where clientele dress questionably?  Think of Disney World with ladies of the evening strolling through the streets giving new meaning to the term “Magic Kingdom”. You, your family and your children would find that repulsive, right? Respectability may be in the eye of the beholder.  We must heed such sensitivities even if it means we lengthen our skirt to acceptable heights (not mini-skirt level) and our neckline (above “open for business” plunge) to leave some things to the imagination.

Our money is green like everyone else’s.  Our dollars become more welcome when we blend in with the surroundings, not stand out or call attention to ourselves in negative ways.  I blanche, and so should you, when proprietors tell us we are not dressed appropriately for their establishment.  One such proprietor was particularly and rightfully incensed by scantily clad ladies who failed to read the clientele.  There’s a time and a place to dress suggestively.  That place is not in public where families gather.  At least one proprietor have been burned by callous and thoughtless expression of First Amendment rights.  That is one business owner too many.  Her dinner traffic is down precipitously and she is now struggling to make ends meet.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.  Yes I’m quoting scripture because it’s appropriate.  If you were the shop owner and your livelihood was being jeopardized by improper actions, would you be sanguine and gladly sacrifice your financial security for a few strays who refused to think lucidly about how to present themselves in your establishment?

When a shop owner loses customers because of something untoward we do, that owner will be less welcoming and maybe hostile.  Oh and in case this is lost on you, their clientele will be tilted against us as well.  Still feeling self-righteous?

We cannot afford to upset the delicate balance because once tipped away from us there may be no amount of effort to encourage the scale to tip towards us.

 

I respect shop owners who welcome us.  I will jealously protect those relationships and will screen my invitees.  If a member of our community invites you to partake with them at a venue they have cultivated and this member requests your dress and actions to fall within her defined limits, you need to heed her request or beg off.  She’s asking for all the right reasons.  You may not agree but if you value her friendship you will comply. We need to wholeheartedly agree that we will function as a monolithic unit in these matters otherwise we will not make progress towards universal acceptance.

There’s no negotiation or debate about this.  Yes I’m adamant.  I can be petulant about what I believe to be right.  I hope you will be part of the continuing solution.  It means the world to everyone in our community and it also legitimizes our claims for parity.

Let me know if you have thoughts you would like to discuss.

   

This Brought Tears to my Eyes

I just don't know why people treat me so well.
This past Saturday evening we went to one of our usual haunts for karaoke, I really don't sing very well.

As I'm sitting at my table of about 20 people, a lady comes over and says I have something for you and she hands me a framed record titled "Louise" and on the back they put a note.

I just started to tear up. Here I am a guy in a dress without any excesses except I look and feel better when dressed en-fem due to a low self esteem, something that may be difficult for others to understand.

For anyone to do what she did I must have affected them in a positive way.

It was simple but to me an honor.


Unexpected conversations

Last Friday a couple of CD's come to visit. One has a BF the other is looking for a M or F, both are very nice girls with no issues.

We went to one of the local dance lounges, I've taken them there before and they really enjoy it, usually women will dance with them, I don't remember if any men have as yet.

As we walked in I recognized a couple women who know me and they "button holed" me, it's fine I enjoy the attention, mean while the 2 who were with me went to the dance area. As I was talking to the girls, a gentleman standing about 4 ft from me looks at me and smiles from ear to ear, he seemed to be with 2 other men.

If I don't recognize someone I'll ask if we've met before, he said no and gave me his name and we shook hands as I told him mine. One of the 2 other men walked away and the guy who was talking to me said he's homophobic, I said he's has the wrong person, I don't want to catch that (OK corny) but it sets the mode for people being comfortable.

I asked the usual question if he was from the area, he said he just retired from the department of the Navy, I asked what his pay level was, he said he was a 12, I commented that that's like a Major, he said you know your stuff, it's only because I had a friend who was a GS 13 Lt Colonel.

He had some take out and I said you should leave before that gets cold, he politely asked if I would like come with him, I said I might go with you, but I won't "come", well the people who were listening to the conversation all cracked up (corny too). He asked if I came there often and I told him yes, usually Fridays after my wife and I have dinner, I don't think he heard the "wife" part because he said maybe I'll see you again.

The second encounter was more unique. I was in the back area with the other 2 girls and a middle aged women comes over and asks if I know a person (name not necessary), I said yes, she's a Transsexual and very nice and actually a genus IQ, she developed transportation software for the government. The lady says to me in a very direct manner "My husband is living with her", you don't hear that every day from a wife.

I just said that's a little beyond my depth to deal with, but your husband has a good eye.

That's it.

Out in Somers Point after a couple months

I Haven't been out in my local area for a few months, it's been cold, windy, rainy and I felt self concuss after putting on about 10+ lbs, us girls are always figure concuss.

So after a couple month hiatus I asked my wife if she would like to do dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, I also had a new outfit I wanted to wear so that gave me a little incentive.

As we walked in, I was greeted by an acquittance who was the former CEO of SJI, he had met me from going to the proxy meetings and we became friendly, a real gentleman, you can tell a person of class when they are in an important position and can be affected by the company they associate with but chose to risk their creditability by associating with deserve people over the small critical minds of judgmental people, I put him on my HERO list. He also introduced me to all his friends that were with him.

As we ate two other couples came in separately who also know us and made a point of coming over to our table to say hi and ask how Millie (my wife) was feeling, rumors had circulated about her health and people seemed very concerned.

After dinner I took my wife home and went back out to a local dance lounge. Again many of the people who know me asked why they hadn't seen me for awhile, but anyone who knows how much effort it takes to do makeup and look right can understand that it does take time and effort besides all the other conditions that go along with Cross-Dressing. I don't want to spend time getting ready and not have an audience (I know I sound self centered) to admire all my effort.

I like to "cruse" the bar area where they're always people who know me and might be with a new friend who they introduce me to. That happened last night a couple times, but this one person was a hoot.

He looked like a very Catholic Irishman, rigid in their philosophy about anyone how doesn't fit the norm. He was sitting with a lady who introduced me to him, so I thought they were together, what do I know, when I first went out 20 years ago, I used to think every couple was married until my wife clued me into these lounges were "meat markets", I had never heard the term before that. 

We shake hands and I do have a reasonably firm grip, he asks "are you a man", I replied, you felt my grip, he said, I've been to Tia land and have seen many TS/CD's but they're all tall and when the approach me I tell them to go and play basketball. 

We talked a few minuets about the usual concerns, if I was gay, into men and so on, I was very honest and tried to describe the differences with the CD lifestyle, I think he became very comfortable with me, enough to say, "I have to tell you, you look damn good" and with that he reaches behind me as he kisses me on the cheek and says I really like you and gives my butt a squeeze. I was really taken back, I thought he was going to be offensive. 

I guess people treat you the way they see you.

The Art Museum





Saturday night I went to the grand opening to a new Art Museum located in the Claridge Hotel in Atlantic City.

I have to admit it was quite impressive. I'm really not an art coinsure, but I can appreciate what I consider talent. There were a number of artists who had their work displayed, most notably, Burt Young. I must admit I really never knew his name but he was very recognizable, he played Paulie in the Rocky movies, the brother in law, I would have thought he would have more of an ethnic (Italian) name, I mean "Young" sounds more WASP like.


So here is the way the night starts. The function is "Cocktail Attire", fancy name for wear a suit and gown, don't come in with sneakers on, baggy jeans hanging down to your Butt crack and a "wife beater" T shirt on, of course some people who buy 5000.00 to 250,000 dollar art can't read or maybe think they don't have too. I wanted to look right and I respect requests so that I might be respected back. I wore a long black form fitting gown and a black designer shrug my, murdered (yes murdered for real) neighbor gave me about 8 years ago.


There was a large group of people on the wide stairs waiting to be let in so there were a few minutes for people to look around and chat with one another. One of the artist who does beach related photography (very good BTW) noticed me and called out my name. Well apparently "Louise" is a little popular and a few people who were in front turned and wanted to great me too. I felt a little self conscious but also proud that people of high status would show they knew me, it was very flattering, especially when you're a cross-dresser.


As the doors open the crowd started to enter, I crossed the threshold and saw the Mayor, I put my hand out to shake his but instead he reach and grabbed me in a bear hug and kissed me on the lips, this man is about 6'2, I'm 5'2, so I was at a disadvantage. I was totally shocked, yes he has met me before (both ways), but I never expected him to react the way he did.


As I was trying to regain my composure I looked forward and there was a photographer reaching over people heads to get my picture, I don't know how that turned out. Then I looked to my left and my eye doctor is standing next to me and asks me if he can have a picture with me (I have two eye doctors, this one is an ocular specialist also a eye surgeon, he gives me an injection in my left eye once a month) how impressive is that, he has a PHD and is a practicing Doctor and he wants his picture with me..


As I walked through the gallery people who know me from various functions or restaurants I go to and of course my businesses would come over to say hello and introduce me to their wife/husband or friends they were with, unless you've been in someone else's shoes and know them on both sides you can't understand why someone would risk everything and (in this case) cross dress in public.


As I came to the back of the museum, there was Burt Young in person sitting on a metal folding chair, looking almost in a blank stare. To me it almost looked as if he just accepted the fact of who he was and didn't mind pictures taken with him. But as I stood back I could see there seemed to be a problem, perhaps dementia of some type. Most of the artists were describing their work or talking to a few people, socializing if nothing else, but Bert Young looked BLANK, he never moved from that spot not an inch, what a pity. I hope some of his work sold.

The New Car

Another episode in the life of Lou/ise.

For about a year I have been scanning the Toyota Certified used car sites for a new Toyota XLE they also make an XLE Limited edition and even though I was in the business I was more of a "general surgeon" and not 100% aware of every model of car, after all there must be 600-700 different styles and models according to a quick Google search.  I addressed repairs as they came in regardless of type, but still didn't know all the models.

Never the less I was looking specifically for a Minivan from Toyota that had a radar controlled cruise control but I wasn't sure of the exact name it was called, I later found out it's called DLCC (Digital Laser Cruse Control) and that wasn't because the sales person at the dealership told me, he didn't know either and that's why this had developed into a fiasco.

After finding two 2013 Toyota XLE Minivans in Runnemede, NJ I called to ask if they were equipped with the option of Cruse Control that had the option of setting the cruse to a specific speed and it being able to slow down and speed up as cars in front of me dictated, I was informed yes. I said I would be up to look at them and was told the 2 cars would be waiting for me.

My wife and I took the 50 mile ride with our title and a check in hand. The dealer has a greeter at the door and escorts you to the next sales person in line, ours was a nice person about 40's, he was very polite and had mentioned he had been at this dealership about a month.

After some chit chat to qualify us (I guess) he took us to the first car, we weren't very impressed by the color or interior so he said I'll get the other one. He pulled it over to the side of the building and we check it out, it was exceptionally clean. Being about 10 years newer than our car I wasn't sure of all the buttons and controls, for example we have a separate roof mounted control center for the garage door opener and a couple other options on this car they were mounted on the mirror and were unnoticeable until you actually saw them. I was also quite disappointed the backup camera was very small, about the size of a point and shoot camera screen, if you have the option of the built in navigator then it's much larger.

I then ask again about the cruise control and where the radar was, ours is in the lower front bumper and you can see it.  Being unfamiliar with the car I figured they hid it somewhere else and the sales person said it's built into the back of the mirror, there was a little white thing there, so I figured that was it, but questioned that and he said I'll check to make sure, which he never did. Now I could have taken the car for a ride, but we would have had to get on a highway to test the cruise with could have taken about 45 minutes, we had been there about 3 hours by now and my wife wanted to get to work, besides, we had his professional assurance it was equipped the way we wanted.

It took another 3 hours between paper work and other conversation and negotiation before we finally left exhausted about 7:30 at night, seven and a half hours to buy a car, it was almost the same when I bought my own car a year before.

We stopped for a pizza dinner and were on the road by 8:30. I set the cruse but couldn't locate the controls for distance, there had to be something somewhere for that, it's an integral part of that type cruse. I asked my wife to check the manual, she said it's right on the front of the horn button where the radio and controls are, you guessed it, the option was not there.

I called the sales man and told him the most important option is not on this car, he said OK, bring it back in the morning, I'm not going to stick you with the car. Fair enough, we were tired anyway and it was almost 9 PM.

The next morning I called the salesman and said I was on my way up and wanted to make sure he was there and there would be no difficulty, he said he would come in special, he had to bring his kids because Thursday was his day off and he didn't have a sitter. I apologized but I needed to take care of this as soon as possible. As I was driving up, I get a call from the sales manager, he informs me all sales are final, I said look, the car was supposed to have this option and it doesn't, he said in so many words, you bought it, you should have looked, I said I relied on your sales person, do you have unreliable people. I also mentioned I stopped payment on the check.

I get up there, the salesman is there with his 2 kids and the sales manager, a no game player guy comes over and says look, we're not taking the car back, we go back and forth and I say look, the car was misrepresented, I was VERY specific of want I wanted, I could have bought a car near me if I wanted something different. He said let me talk the GM, he comes back and says we'll take another 1600.00 off the price, I said that's generous, but I'll give you 500.00 to take it back for your trouble and your salesman's time.  He thinks a second and said we'll wipe the deal, give him his car back.

As I leave, I ask about any paper work, I'm pretty much in shock at how accommodating he was and wasn't expecting such a quick decision he said we didn't do any title work so you can just go but I forgot to ask for my title back. I get home and see the other title for my other car on the desk and said "Oh Shit", I give a call and the salesman says I'll get it in the morning. Since I wanted to go away Friday en-fem anyway I decided to drive up as Louise. As I walk up to the door, someone rushes over to open it for me, as I walk in a guy from a few desks back comes running over and says "I know you, you're Louise from Margate, my Mom and I were customers of yours". All the salesmen and managers are gathered around with big smiles on their faces as if I was some celebrity, but in the mean time, I cost them almost 8 hours of effort and compromising on their policy of taking back a sold car.

I need to give a high recommendation to the Runnemede Toyota for their integrity and honesty in doing the right thing, this could have been much worse and gone to court, I think the decision would have been "contributory negligence" I was as much at fault as the dealer, they did the right thing in my book and I took care of the salesman for his time and effort so everyone was happy.

As my quote states

"Everything I do right turns out wrong"

The 2015 Atlantic City Auto Show

Over the last 12-15 years I have gone to the Atlantic City Car show Auction, usually alone and ALWAYS en-fem (as Louise). This year after meeting a few gurls within 50-60 miles vicariously though one of them, I asked if they would like to join me.

 Heather, Staci, Nikki and Brianna (Brianna was not at the Auto Show)

The actual motive, I believe for joining me and also for myself, in going to this venue is more about presenting ourselves in public to see how far we can push limits. I don't mean by over exaggerating our appearances by dressing to provocatively or like "Drag Queens" , but more to see how we will be treated in a large public venue. 

I know even after 19 years of being "out" I still get a kick and enjoyment of people needing to talk with me, there is nothing more important than being recognize for our choice of appearance, but also for people acknowledging accepting and respecting us.

The conversation usually amongst most cross-dressers or even people who are interested in the lifestyle is  how "Passable" are you, it almost seems as if our rational is taken for granted that we are pretty much normal, but then the other question that follows next is "are you gay" or do you like men. What most people (including us as CD's too) don't understand is that everyone, who is human has sexual needs and it doesn't matter who or what level of society or business we are, sex is a VERY motivating commodity, in fact, you can have sex rich or poor, fat or skinny or ugly and attractive.

Many people of the Christian faith try to address sex on a morality and guilt basis, yeah, that works, ask a Priest. Other faiths feel it's OK to have sex with minors, as long as it's a family member (I have to think about that one). I'm sure they're many perverted beliefs but because we as male cross-dressers are considered aberrant people automatically consider us "cruising". But many people go to a bar/lounge either to pickup or be picked up and that's normal behavior because you're wearing the properly tagged underwear and socks or pantyhose. 

 

I seem to always go off thought.

The part of the day where it becomes more interesting is when my wife (Millie) picks us up from the show and we go to our favorite breakfast place, but for dinner time now.

As we walk in (4 CD's and one GG) the lady owners welcome us with hugs and kisses and set us up at the most visible table in the place to put us on display. They hovered over us like we were their personal guests, hugging us and having pictures with us. For the other gurls it had to be thrilling to be treated with such respect and admiration (FYI: this is a Greek owned establishment).

I have to also point out, that all but one of these gurls has been out for a few years, usually with a group, possibly for safety, but still trying to discover how it feels to be welcome, there is a difference between acceptance, tolerance and being welcomed, the first two are usually done because people do what's acceptable practice (politically correct, so to say) but being welcomed is something done because people see only who you are regardless of your look or status level in life. For example, a politician commands a certain amount of respect, even if you hate what he stands for, you have to accept or tolerate his BS or be subject to some type of punishment. But take a homeless person who has been down on his luck, he has nothing to offer you, nothing you can take from him that hasn't been taken already, he looks like hell but as a person he asks for little more than just some "daily bread", you empathize with him, you want to try to help and might offer a meal or a bath. To me that's the difference between being accepted and welcomed.

After dinner we went to a dance lounge, there was a new hostess (I really didn't know that) she addressed me with a warm reaction, I thought she knew me. We went over to one side of the bar and the lady manager came over a few minutes later and said to me "the new hostess wants to apologize that she might have scared you, we have your picture on the wall and she was so excited to meet you she over reacted". How about that, talk about celebrity status.  She then said I have a table on the dance floor I want to give to you, I'll put reserve signs on it so you can be comfortable. Holly mackerel, instead of being critical of me and any motives I had by bringing in 4 other CD's with me we were given TOP honors. One of the gurls (Heather) said Louise has pull where ever she goes, she's exactly right in how important it is to act "Lady Like" in public in order to allow people to respect us first before they make assumptions. 

I can't take credit for most of this, I always tell people when they say I have courage (I use another term that starts with a "B") I express they're the ones with courage because people will be more critical about them accepting me and think that they might be the one with ulterior motives.

Also Millie was my backup person, she created, accepted, encouraged and help developed my look so I wouldn't look or act like a clown if and when I went out. She is the HERO.

Louise

I haven't posted for awhile, but I want to dedicate this Blog post for my wife.

I won't get into details, but even though I love to Cross-Dress and sometimes become self centered to the point of being selfish, I'll do anything to help my wife stay healthy and comfortable.

She has have a VERY trying couple of years with a triple set back starting about a month from this past Thanks Giving. Fortunately, she seems to have stabilized even though she is dealing with some deficits, at least she's still here.

With all she has been though her concern is more about me and how I feel and if I loo OK when I go out. She critics me and if she feels I need a touch up or my hair needs to be worked on, she insists on taking care of it. How in the world could you even find a lady like that?

Sure we go though our, what I call her "Tourette Syndrome"  moments, I call them that because when I say things (in a teasing way) she will start to call me expletives and wave her hands around give me the "one finger salute". I just laugh it off and tell everyone who is around us that she is having one of her fits, it goes a long way to mitigate the situation, but we've been like that for the past 51 years.

When my wife worked at a gay lounge as a Karaoke hostess in Atlantic City (another story), I would sit at the bar, many people were visitors to AC and had never seen or met us before. She would say something, anything to anyone and I would comment in a sarcastic way, that would set up a bantering between the two of us. Of course the newbies in the crowd with look astonished and though there was going to be a fist fight. It was hilarious and we still carry on the same way when ever we're out in public or at parties, people wait for the spontaneity. One of my (so called) friends calls it the Lou & Millie show, not very original, but I think it's meant as an endearing label.

Anyway, I could go on for years about Millie, there is no way Louise could ever exist without her, she is my inspiration, she gave me courage and her approval, she insisted I be me and had no reservations as to my motives, she taught me how to do my makeup, she insisted I not look like a clown and she was my "Backup" in the event of a verbal assault.

I don't mean to be rude with this comment, but she's the one with the "BALLS", I doubt very much I could be as accommodating if the shoe were on the other foot.

I love my wife "Millie" and everyone who has met us in person and knows her understands why.

Louise

Being a Good Samaritan or my new quoite "Every Thing I do Right Turns out Wrong"

This is a long Diatribe


I don't consider myself an overly magnanimous person, but if I see someone in need I try to help. I did this in school when a kid was mistreated by other kids even when I was always the littlest. I did the same in the military against a big Southern "Red Neck" twice my size who was picking on a little guy. I also helped many customers who were down on their luck and needed repairs, I fixed their cars at cost or gratis. Even my Mother and brother who has a Masters in business finance. I bought my mother a home and supported both of them until my brother got tired of living with her and asked me to help him buy a Duplex. When my mother died and I was dealing with my own set backs, he took advantage of me. I've even helped a recent person out who unknowingly over extended his budget, I voluntarily gifted him funds so he could purchase a safe vehicle for his family and what did I ask any of these people for in return, a lot, FRIENDSHIP, nothing more or less, just be my friend and treat me nice. I get none of that, my brother never even calls me on Holidays or invites us over for a dinner or a drink, I can't tell you how many times we waited for him and his wife because she wanted dinner with her family first, Even the person I gifted money to doesn't have 30 minuets for me to talk a couple times a month when I go up there to shop.


Yeah, I bitch about this a lot because it means a lot to me, I feel my wife and I give from our hearts and souls, the least others can do is respect us for what we've willingly offered. We ask for nothing material and believe me, NO ONE, NO ONE EVERY GAVE EITHER OF US A THING, even when we needed it too. Like my long time lawyer (ha ha) friend who I had to sue because he way over billed me, lost the case on top of it and the arbitration board could have disbarred him for the way he treated me but didn't charge him with the last count of taking funds for a different case I had with his firm, TOTALLY a disbarment offence, he paid up the very next day, fucking crook. I'm just trying to prove a point.


So here is the current "Every Thing I do Right Turns out Wrong" situation.


This was a first for me.

 

My brother-in-law aka "BIL" and his GF (both widowed) came down from Burlington Vermont to share Thanks Giving with us. I thought it would be nice to take him out for a holiday drink.

 

Some background about him, so you understand the way this situation came down. He's about 66 I think, he was only with one woman from about age 16 and married when he enlisted into the Navy. He's not the brightest bulb in the package, but just a really nice guy, he actually looks almost like Alfred E Neumann from the old Mad Comic books.

 

After his wife died from a late and misdiagnosed rectal cancer, he just stayed home but worked at entry level jobs. He drove down a few years ago to see visit us and since he had NEVER driven on the NJ Parkway he just drove though the speed toll lanes, when he got home he had a few hundred dollars of toll evasion tickets in the mail, so now you can understand "the rest of the story".

 

We leave the lounge and he reminds me that they wanted Ice Cream, so we stop at the local WAWA, as we drive up I see a 16-18 year old kid (I assumed was a boy) standing by the comer of the store dressed in a very thin sweat shirt and pants shivering, we go into the store and I'm debating if I should ask if this kid needs a ride, as my BIL is paying for the Ice Cream I go out and walk over and ask if he had a ride coming soon, he said my Uncle was supposed to pick me up, BUT, it turns out he's a girl. Oh well she's freezing. She says yes that's kind of you.

 

My BIL comes out and I tell him we're giving this girl a ride just down the road in the same direction we're going. He pulls out and has to accelerate to beat the Yellow light and just makes it. I turn to ask if the girl has a cell phone and to call her ride to tell them we're taking her and before I can a cop cars lights come on and we're pulled over. Well all I can think of is my BIL running the Yellow light.

 

The cop comes to the drivers side and asks for credentials and I hear a knocking at the rear door behind me and another cop has the girl get out of the car. The first cop comes back and says, OK, here's the story, we've been watching this girl for 2 hours, she just got out of jail for prostitution, what's your story.

 

My BIL is FROZE, he's gripping the steering wheel for his life, he's in shock, all he can say is we bought Ice Cream and my GF is at my house, he's like babbling and sees visions of spending the night in jail for soliciting. Then the cop says, I don't know if I believe your story, now he's really shaking, I said, Officer, I'm the one who asked if she needed a ride, I though she was a young kid.

 

You have to appreciate this scene, I'm wearing riding boots and a Fedora hat, I look like a Mobster as Lou, my BIL looked like a "John" so this was really difficult. In the mean time the Ice Cream is going to melt in the back seat. The cops talk with the girl and she confirms our story and they tell us she's going back to jail and tells us to move on.

 

Happy Thanks Giving.

 

Louise

"Every Thing I do Right Turns out Wrong"

Millie and her "Maidens"

Millie had some unexpected guests

My Wife's Knee

Yes, I know, this Blog is supposed to be about "Louise", but without my wife Louise wouldn't exist, she's the person who created and encouraged Louise to become the Happy and fulfilled person he/she is today, so the least Louise can do is devote some details about Millie's life.Millie suffered an knee injury as a cheerleader in High school which caused her to need a replacement knee 17 1/2 years ago, also do to her unfortunate attributes as an endomorph body type her left knee had to be replaced 3 years ago. The right one having outlasting it's useful life had to be replace again 2 weeks ago.So with that preface, I took Millie to the hospital on the 10th. of Nov for her surgery.


As a dutiful and concerned husband I left Louise at home, although I only wear female clothing even as Lou, it's mostly androgynous. I wear woman's jeans, boots and a woman's button down blouse so everything looks tailor made and people really don't figure the whole thing out because I myself am a mesomorph build and look a little like a Mob hit man as a guy, so it's confusing to say the least.Millie is wheeled into the pre-surgery area where they hook up the mentoring equipment and stick in the shunts for any drugs. As they're working on her, I am sitting in a chair and a large Black nurse looks at me and says "I know who you are" of course I don't remember her and she says I met you at a "Night's in Venice" party in Ocean City, but you were dressed differently. Needless to say, my wife is a little upset, she's there going to have a major procedure and this lady wants me to show the other 5-8 people in the area my pictures, which due to my uncontrollable compulsion I acquiesced too., Millie wasn't very happy, but they actually treated her with more care.


So now comes the waiting room period, the room has about 8-10 people but after a couple hours they're now 3 other men besides myself. We start talking about why we're there and who does what, one guy mentions my boots and asks if I ride horses, I am small (5'2" tall) so I could pass as a Jockey especially with the black specific riding boots and riding jacket I had on with the skintight jeans. Of course another guy noticed my crab apple colored nails, yes I have them painted too. So again I have to show my pictures, even the admitting nurse had to start asking me questions. Well you know, after 5+ hours you need to kill time somehow.


Once I found out how she did I was able to go home, let out and feed our dogs, eat dinner and go back and see Millie. But as I was leaving the hospital one of the men was walking back in and stopped me. He said, you know you really seem very happy and I need to ask you for some advice. He went on to tell me he was there for his wife who was a widow and he married her after a short period after her loss. She was left very well off due to him being a doctor and now this guy was more of a companion, but the issue was, he was being treated as a piece of trash, he was more of a "go-for", there was no affection or intimacy. He wanted to know what I thought the problem was. I was pretty much put in an awkward position, but being honest I had to tell him I felt she only married him out of loneliness and just someone as a companion and nothing else. He said, I pretty much felt the same thing and meeting and talking to you, I just felt you would be honest and knowledgeable and he thanked me.


Please believe me, I in no way consider myself clairvoyant, I don't know anything, ask my son and wife, the only time they need me is when they don't ask me and then do something I need to help get them out of trouble with, other than that I'm a "Dumass". But I've been beat up so bad all my life and have been fortunate enough though my wife to finally be able to see both sides of life. I have a friend (I use the term loosely) who thinks I don't know he experiments many mornings, he tells me his schedule has tightened so if I want to come up and talk with him before work, he doesn't have time, but I see though that. I really don't know why after I've expressed my friendship he's not willing to return it, but as the saying goes "c'est la vie" (shit happens) but I keep at it.


Anyway, all the people at the hospital surgery center wanted to meet me and I was going out en-fem Wednesday anyway, so when I stopped at the hospital, Millie was still in the surgery recovery area, I went in to see the waiting area person, but the girl at the front desk who know me both ways had called her to expect me, she was overwhelmed,  apparently she also called the Black nurse in the surgery area because she comes out of the back surgery area and drags me back there the show me off to all the other people.It's really amazing, I'm still Lou, the little guy who only draws attention due to my crazy way of dressing up. I don't become any smarter or better looking as me but people see me as someone special, they want to gobble me up, they hug me, hold my hand, kiss me, compliment me on my looks and even ask me to help them with concerns about their lives.


WHY, WHY, WHY I ask you why, I don't have an answer. BUT, if you've seen on the news a new fad has just evolved, someone has come up with a new radical idea, people put paper bags over their heads and then socialize for a period of time, I don't know who long, but I suspect a few weeks. After they get to know each other they finally take the bags off and see the other persons face, but first they got the chance to learn about the others personality. Isn't that a little like what I'm going though, I think it's another way of cross-dressing.


Please send your comments to, CuteLouise1@aol.com, you too Joe aka H****er

Life Of Louise

As I've often stated, the reason I have risked everything in my life after discovering my "Alter Ego" as Louise, is the way people seem to be drawn to me. This is not a delusion, you can't make up  the scenarios and experiences, at least I can't.

These are some experiences over the last couple weeks.

The Cat Scan

 I had to have a CAT scan, most of the staff are now familiar with my wife and I, it seems as if we might be owners of some of the equipment there. After the scan I forgot to ask for a disc, sometimes they might burn one for you while doing the test, but I forgot to ask.

So I went back in about a week later dressed as Louise and as I expected the receptionist said I'll place the order and you can get it in 3-4 days, I said OK, but I have some things coming up next week so I'll be in later in the week. I didn't ask her to do anything special and accepted the condition, it's not a first time for me. She then said, wait, let me see what I can do and she went back to the area where they copy the files.

As I turned to take a seat, the was a couple there and the woman waved at me as if she knew me, I just can't remember most people. So I went over and sat next to her, she obviously knew me well and we were having a conversation. Then another woman walked in and said, Hi Louise, I just was at Millie's store and started talking with me too. A few minuets later the receptionist came out from the back and said, here it is all done for you.

Yes, I know it's a long story for just a simple experience, but I can assure you, Lou would still be waiting for that disc.

The Political Debate

The reason I had dressed that day was because the Chamber of Commerce was sponsoring a political debate at a country club, both Congressional candidates, the Sheriff and a few others know me as Louise and I just like to add spice to the mix, so I go as Louise, besides it makes me feel important or they think I'm NUTS, who cares.

I walked in and there were only a few people and no one I recognized, I sat in front of an older man (89 he told me later) who was speaking with a woman.The woman said, hi Louise so I turned to acknowledge her, she happened to be a Chamber staff member and she introduced me to the older gentleman. He polity said, I'm so fortunate to be surrounded by pretty ladies, of course Louise had to clue him in and he for a moment seemed caught off guard, he then says, I don't know what you are, but you are pretty.

The fact is, this guy was pretty sharp for his age, he heard and saw perfectly well without hearing aids or glasses and was "sharp as a tack", he was also a stanch Ocean City Conservative who was VERY vocal about his Republican party support. I try not to get into political party discussions other than point out what I like about each others beliefs. As we're talking, another lady comes over to me who works for the current Congressman and I get up to great her, she calls over to the Congressman, see I told you I knew Louise.

We chatted a few moments and when she left, the old man wanted to have a conversation with me, we started with, where from and then who we might know as mutual acquaintances, he seemed very comfortable with me and enjoyed meeting someone of my "lifestyle" it was a first for him and something I'm sure he thought he would never experience. It just goes to show that even someone as off beat as people might think I am gives people a chance to realize Cross-dressers might be more normal than expected.

The Garage Sales

Saturday morning there were a number of local garage sales. Since I stopped riding my bike (I hope temporarily) I thought I'd check them out.

The first one I went to didn't have anything of interest and as I was leaving, the lady said, I like the boots. Well of course I have to reply, I said everything I'm wearing is woman's and I even showed her my nails. She asked, what's that all about, I said I'll show you a picture, she said, OMG, I've met you out before. We had a nice conversation and her husband said, please say Hi next time you see us.

I went to two more sales, the woman running the second sale knew me and at the last one, a couple who used to be customers of mine were looking around and had a conversation with me about Louise too.

For me, if it weren't for Louise, Lou would have no life and that possibly answers why I titled my blog, LIFE OF LOUISE

I have no idea

A couple weeks ago my wife and I were at the Karaoke restaurant we normally go to on Saturday nights. As usual when we come in most of the people know us and great us with hugs and "Air Kisses".

We went over to our usual seating area by the front window, it's mostly blocked to the outside, so it's not a vanity issue for me and it's sort of in a very out of the way area. I usually get up to use the rest room or maybe just cruse around the bar area to talk to a few acquaintances for weekly updates about family or just general chit chat, so I'm not really parading obnoxiously around.

This night there were 2 women and a man, 40ish, sitting at the further end of the tables lined up from where we sit, they're usually 4 tables. They were pretty much not paying any attention to anything, I only know because when I get up to sing (embarrass myself) I like to look around to see the reactions, it didn't even look as if they noticed me.

Around 11:45 I motioned to my wife it was time to go, she wanted to say goodnight to a couple people and at the same time one of the women who was sitting by us came over to me and grabbed my face and said, I've been watching you all night and you have a great ass, well all I could say was thanks. She sits back down and the Karaoke guy puts on a dance song, the lady gets up again and drags me onto the dance floor, it's fine, it happens all the time. But, the guy she was with jumps up and runs onto the dance floor and grabs the woman by her hair and drags her off the dance floor yelling at the top of his lungs for her to sit and not move. He then looks at me like he wants to start something when my wife jumps in and starts to chastise him for doing what he did to the woman, she said you better check yourself into a woman's shelter, this was uncalled for and he's abusive.

On the way home my wife told me that when the woman went to the restroom he had followed her and stood in front of the door guarding it. I don't know what his concern was, she definitely wasn't anything to write home about, but he had a control situation going on in his mind.

At least he wasn't there this weekend, I think the manager flagged him.

Some Observations

I have been called naïve, I really consider that a polite term for calling someone dumb. I consider myself exceptionally naïve only because I naturally trust people, who tend to be untrustworthy, I guess I live, mostly by the golden rule "Do unto others as you would have them do to you" although many  go by the other phraseology  "Do unto others, before they do it to you".


But I don't want to paint myself with a totally virgin brush, we all have weaknesses and at times might just overstep our boundaries slightly, I won't get into details, for me it's a moot subject, but I'm trying to point out that even a naïve person can see beyond some smoke mirrors.


The reason I'm prefacing this post is because of my very recent experiences this week. I have never pretended for an instant that I look so good as to pass and I've never (I don't think) been so conceded to think I look exceptionally attractive when en-fem, what I do like to say is "I make a nice presentation". What that means is, I'm clean shaven, I'm small in stature (although due to a medical condition, expanding), I do my makeup a little on the elaborate side, but it works for day and evening and I try to dress appropriately for the occasion I'm in.


These were a couple activities I happened to be involved with this week. I went to New Hope and stayed over night, the next day on my way home I stopped at a "Flea Market" on Rt 29, it was about 90% Russian venders, I didn't know until I spoke with a few. I have absolutely no idea of how Russians acceptance of cross-dressers is, but they were exceptionally polite to me, either because they looked at me as a potential customer or were familiar with other CD's due to the proximity to New Hope, but I didn't really notice any gay type vendors (not that they have labels), so I was very well attended to when I asked a question and a few complimented me on the jewelry I was wearing. One person who was a vendor stopped me and said he remembered me from Atlantic City when the Antique Show would come here. He said, you always had an entourage behind you, I don't know why he said that, I usually went alone or with my wife.


When I got home I had a message on my home phone, it was a personal call from the gentleman who is running for Congress (not a robo call). I called back and a male answered, I asked for the party who called me and he said, he's out right now, but if you leave your name I'll have him return your call. At this point I was sort of obligated to leave my name, when I told him he said, Oh, hold on, he's here and wants to speak with you. The gentleman said, Oh Louise, I'm so glad you returned my call, It would be an honor if you would please join my wife and I for dinner


Yes, it's most likely a political function, I know the restaurant, it's fairly intimate (small) so it can't be a very large guest list. I consider it one of my highest honors by being both personally invited and also by realizing he was screening calls, but wanted to speak with me directly. He will certainly get my vote and I'll post how the affair went.


I also had to go to my Urologist en-fem, he's a trip, the first thing he said was, OK drop your pants, I'm doing a digital  exam. No way, he was laughing like hell. He was the one who aspirated me a few months ago.

Congressman's invitation

Last month I met an ex-congressman's son, I had mentioned the father in previous posts but the son had never met me. What I found interesting in this situation is the old axium "the acorn doesn't fall far from the tree" was right on.

Of course this person is a highly educated and confident criminal attorney and (I think) prosecutor, so dealing with someone like me was no issue.

As I walked into the tent where the function was being held, the candidate left the people he was in conversation with and greeted me by putting his arm into my elbow, as you would a Lady, and said I want to introduce you to someone. He walked me over to President Senator Sweeney. The senator is a HUGE man, my hand felt as if I put it into a baseball glove, I don't have very big hands, but I've always prided myself by not being over griped, I couldn't even span the width of his palm. What was interesting was his initial reaction towards me, it was almost as one of my friends likes to eloquently put it "seeing a train wreck", but he was polite.

As I mingled I was surprised that a few people only know me vicariously, one though her son I used to race bicycle with and a few who had seen the press articles about me. I was also surprised that even though this is a liberal party, people are often controlled by their peers no matter what they might believe or want to do, no one wants to be ostracized for doing something others might consider controversial, but I seemed to be well accepted or maybe just a curiosity, but I was made to feel very welcome.

One of the interesting conversations I had was with a "person of the cloth". We just started a general conversation and he told me a joke, I replied with one I know (slightly off color, but not rude), the next few jokes got a little more interesting.

When I was ready to leave I bid good night to the candidate and mentioned I may have had one drink to many, he offer to drive me home but I said "oh no, people might talk". I'm not sure how that went over. 

Beach Blast

I volunteered a couple weeks ago to help the director of a large GBLT event. I spent a full day painting a dance floor that was about 100x100 ft and also mounting about 40-50 flag poles to a fence and in the sand, I think it was quite an effort on my part. Two days later I was asked if I would take part in the "Drag Race" event on the beach, I was told that the lady organizing the volunteers had no one to take part in it and it was to help open the beach event, so "Easy Lou" accepted.

It's not as if I didn't want to, but the first day the event owner seemed to be a little indifferent towards me, not even thanking me for my effort, and didn't even tell me he was leaving after leaving instructions of what needed to be done, so I finished the job with one other person.

Saturday I showed up at the scheduled time (dressed en-fem this time). The lady running the volunteers had to get a few of her girlfriends to dress as guys "Drag KINGS" and there was one Drag Queen, and myself a Cross-dresser. We were taken from the Claridge Hotel to Florida Ave (about a mile) in rolling chairs, interestingly I was born in AC and used to spent most of my life on the Boardwalk till I was about 20 years old and never rode in a Rolling Chair, it was a first for me.

When we got to our destination we had to pose for some photo shoots, (I am a camera lens hag) so it was fun for me, I felt like a movie star. We went onto the beach and after some introductions of who we were we had to compete in a "Drag Race" in the sand with high heels on and around two markers for 4 laps, about 400 feet. If anyone knows me, I've kept in pretty good shape between cycling and running 3 days a week with each sport. Let me tell you, even the girls kicked my ass, I was so embarrassed I came in last.


But the part that really upset me was when I wanted to introduce my wife to the event owner and he didn't have time, you can bet I won't help out again.

The Painter, update

Over the weekend my painter had another job to do before coming back to mine on Monday. As I went out to great him he says to me "I hear your famous" I tried to play dumb (it' not to hard for me) but I didn't know how he found out.


He said when he was at the other job on Saturday he mentioned he needed to pickup some equipment from a house in Linwood, the clients asked where he was working and he mentioned my name, they dropped the bomb on him, apparently their comments were very positive.


He said, you know what gave you away was your nails, I noticed them the first day but I just wasn't sure and didn't want to say anything inappropriate, he was very comfortable with the whole thing.

Millie and Louise with the Mayor of Atlantic City

Millie and Louise at a social event at the Tropicana in Atlantic City

With

Mayor Don Guardian

of

Atlantic City

D

My Painter

This past Monday my painters started working on the outside of my home. I had originally met this person while getting coffee at the local McDonald's, I stopped in after cycling and he was dressed in paint stained clothes, it was obvious he painted, so I asked if he would give me an estimate which turned out very fair compared to other estimates I received, we met a couple times to go over what needed to be done and had set up the scaffolding the week before so he knew me pretty well in my "Lou" persona, which definitely is NOT a "Kodak Moment".

So Monday he comes to start and was parking in my driveway, I asked if he wouldn't mind parking at the curb because my "Twin Sister" was coming over, I was going out in the afternoon to a social event with my wife to meet the new AC Mayor en-fem, I figured I'd break the painters chops because he would still be here when we left.

About 4 PM I come out of my front door to get my mail and he was loading up his truck, as I walked by him (without acknowledging him) he turned from the drivers door and said hello, the paused and looked and said, you almost got me, I looked at him and said, I'm Lou's sister, he looked again and said, OMG, you look exactly alike, I'm Bill the painter, I gave him a sissy limp wrist-ed 2 finger ladylike handshake and had only softened my voice slightly. He asked if "Lou" was in the house because he wanted to give him an estimate on the carpentry work needed, I told him he had gone out and he could talk to him the next day.

The next day I spoke to the painter and commented that my sister told me she met him, he had no comment. I'm going out tomorrow, Friday, and he'll have another chance to meet "Louise" I wonder if he realized who I was and didn't want to say anything.

I'll find out, because I'm a persistent little bitch.